Characters from King of Queens We All Work With
The Spence Olchin
Spence is a good guy to have around the office, he is earnest and works hard to be good at his job, always sure to carry his own weight. He blends in with the crowd, which is fine with him, never really interested in standing out amongst the crowd, and his work will never rise to such a level that it creates a ‘must see’ brand. That appears to make him generally content with his lot in life, but for those who get to know Spence, they learn that he actually has hopes and dreams that extend beyond the role with which he’s most identified. You learn he tries to do other things on his own like starting his own business, or try to invent the next trademarkable product. However, nothing to this point has taken off, and thus, he shows up every day, doing the same thing, and does it well. Spence is a good friend to have around, will pick you up at the airport, take you to lunch, lend you a little money, and you see that it stems from a place of insecurity, and the nice gestures are somewhat his way of ingratiating himself to others. No one ever says a bad word about Spence, because there is nothing to say. As we said, he’s a good guy, and as you think about the landscape of the many personalities up and down the hierarchy, the ’good guys’ are often in short supply, and why we’re happy to keep our Spence!
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The Deacon Palmer
Deacon is awesome, and if everyone likes and gets along with Spence, Deacon is beloved by the organization. He never shies away from hard work, and never comes across as being above even the most tedious or menial assignment. He knows he is there to work, and happy to do so. His mission in life is less about career and climbing the corporate ladder, but about his family, his children, and doing what is needed to provide for them and lead a good life. You learn that he is well-educated, having graduated from a prestigious university, yet seems content with the role that many see as more entry-level, along side those with far less formal education. After working with Deacon awhile, seeing how much he dedicates himself to his job, you realize that he is purposeful about protecting his standing, and job security, which is not always the case as you move up the corporate ladder. Thus, he is far more strategic about his career than most who simply grab the next rung of that ladder as quickly as it becomes available. In a few years, when he gets his kids through school and off to college and best prepared for leading productive, happy lives on their own, you know Deacon will apply the same strategic thinking to his career, and even if it really takes off a decade or two later than most, it will no doubt come with great success and fulfillment because that is who Deacon is.
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The Carrie Heffernan
Carrie is an unpredictable force in the office(and of course she is not alone). On any given day she is super sweet, and will go for coffee, buy everyone coffee, go to lunch, go for drinks, even take on your work if you need her to. Her ‘Highs’ are off the charts delightful, and those days that she comes in like this makes the temperature just a bit cooler and more comfortable, simply a pleasure for all to experience. There are also days that see Carrie a little ‘less’ delightful, which is an indicator that something happened at home, on the way to work, in the elevator up to the office, perhaps the barista who prepared her coffee forgot the Splenda, etc. It could literally be anything. No occurrence big or small is any more or less likely to set Carrie off, whether for hours or an entire day. The good thing is Carrie wears her emotions on her sleeve, so the second she steps foot in the office, everyone knows which way she is leaning, and know to respond in kind, which is typically to stay out of the way. Carrie is very much the extrovert, which she usually harnesses for good, able to make people laugh, keep things light, and sees her relate better to her current team despite the approval she seeks from upper management. Career progression is not likely in the cards for Carrie, as she has only demonstrated good, not great, talent in her present role. But people can surprise you, and the fact is that Carrie is a quick learner, hard worker, and an intelligent person. Given the chance, you would not be surprised if, given the chance, Carrie shows everyone that there is much more to her than may first meet the eye.
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The Arthur Spooner
Arthur is a tough one to deal with inside your organization. While some call him ‘Old School’ or simply ‘Stubborn’, either would only do Arthur justice if the terms were used in the most extreme manner. Arthur can simply not see other viewpoints that disagree with his. He only knows one way to do things, one way to think, and mostly only one way to express himself. That way is usually loudly, forcefully, and passionately. Unfortunately, you also see that there is likely no changing Arthur. He is not only set in his ways, he likes his way of doing business, and believes if he shares his opinions loudly enough, everyone will come around to his way of thinking. This is almost never true, as most see that Arthur’s suggestions and ideas are often only designed to benefit him. He is a pretty self-centered guy, who despite the many errors in his work, and poor behavior that turns people off, somehow has lasted for several years. You struggle to understand the reason why, and after secretly inquiring to the right people how Arthur got hired and stays on the team, you become aware of the rumors that abound, none of which have ever been proven as fact. The urban legend suggests Arthur may have some information of those who hired him that would be potentially damaging to them or the company. The best way to keep him quiet, figuratively speaking, was to keep him close, compensate him well for fairly menial work, and hope to hide him from the larger workforce to minimize the damage he is likely to do. But thankfully, it will only be at other employees and likely the clients, but not the execs who felt forced to bring Arthur into the fold. Finally, you can sleep once learning this, as it is the first reason you’ve heard that remotely makes any sense.
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The Doug Heffernan
Doug is the classic ‘Every Man’. He is good, not great, good-natured yet quick to react if provoked or antagonized, productive but not overly so, and he is funny…but not as funny as he thinks he is. He has a greater opinion of himself than the opinions most have of him, but thankfully, Doug is also tethered to reality, mostly aware of his talents, as well as his limitations. It is why Doug seldom seeks advancement, or chases dreams of taking the corner office someday. That is not who Doug aspires to be, and unlike many, does not believe in any way that he is, or will ever be, qualified to get there. He is the model of ‘contentedness’, with goals that typically stretch to only the very near future, not a day past the coming weekend that include the sporting events he’ll attend or watch on his big screen TV, or getting out to play games, sports, or hit the bar with friends. His goals do not rise to those of his peers and many people around us who want to save the world, solve for homelessness and addiction, or feed the hungry, or possibly discover the meaning of life. That’s not Doug. He knows there is little chance he’ll make a dent in any such area. But, he’ll be good to his fellow man, woman, those he works with, and his closest family and friends. He doesn’t have a mean bone in his body, but is never above having fun, even at the expense of some of the less dominant personalities in the office, like his buddy Spence. You know he and Spence are tight, but they sometimes have a Culprit-Victim type relationship. But there is nothing he wouldn’t do for Spence, nor just about anyone at any time. You take comfort in knowing that the next day, and probably as many days as you work with at the company, Doug will be right there, getting his work done, ready to entertain, and by 10am on a Monday start planning for the upcoming weekend.
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